This is Your 327th Reminder to Order Your Child’s Yearbook Today!

We are, quite literally, begging you.

How will your child commemorate this truly one-of-a-kind school year?

This is going to be one for the history books, that’s for sure. Think of all the unique experiences your student has had! The hilarious Zoom-bombings, the breakout room cyberbullying, the science teacher who never did learn how to mute his mic! Surely you want to make sure your child has a permanent reminder of the zany misadventures of virtual learning in the 2020–2021 school year.

How better to preserve those precious memories than a high-quality printed and bound book full of pictures of a building your child never once set foot in this year?

With so much changing, it’s reassuring to know that this one tradition remains: paying far too much for a yearbook that your student will misplace within a year of graduation and will be accidentally donated to Goodwill and later flipped through by preteens who will mock your child’s hairstyle and fashion choices.

And what better way to underscore the existential dread and sense of unreality of the 2020–2021 school year than a volume full of pictures of people and places you never saw in person? Who doesn’t need a book full of screenshot grids of tiny…